To go on a visit, to receive friends and acquaintances at home is a long tradition. In both cases, we hope to get positive emotions from communication. But it happens that after the next such visit there remains a not very pleasant “aftertaste”. Maybe the whole thing is that we just don’t know how to behave at a party?
Strict observance of etiquette rules was instilled in our ancestors from early childhood and was practically “in the blood”. Does modern man need all these ceremonies? Or is nevertheless the ability to behave correctly is the key to a worthy reputation and good relations outside of time?
Each time has its own etiquette
Of course, prim primitive ceremonies in our time are inappropriate, but even now, going to visit, you must know the rules of etiquette. Especially if you go not to close relatives or friends, but to unfamiliar people. Naturally, you want to make a good impression on them, not to get into an awkward situation in someone else's house. In order to feel more confident, you need to know how to behave at a party. It does not hurt to have an idea about how to receive guests themselves.
But, unfortunately, in our time it is not customary to pay much attention to etiquette, and not every modern person is familiar with the existing rules. We will try to fill this gap.
How to invite?
First of all, you need to know that it is customary to invite people to visit no later than a week before the appointment. This is not just a requirement of etiquette: your potential guests may have other plans that they will have to adjust in order to respond positively to the invitation. In a short time they will not have time to do this.
If you invited a person who does not sympathize or is in conflict with another friend or relative of yours, then the latter should not be called this time.
It is unethical to invite a guest in the presence of another friend whom you do not plan to call on guests.
Are you going to invite people to whom you know nothing about relationships? Then it is worth informing each of them about the other. Thus, the situation will be “resolved” by itself. You’d better have one less guest than the mood of everyone else.
Guests are on the doorstep. How to behave to the owners?
Do not forget that it is the owner who is responsible for ensuring that each of the guests is comfortable at his place. Therefore, the conversation should be directed so that the conversation topics are close and understandable to each of the guests, so that everyone can take part in it, express their own opinion. But to force to maintain a conversation in addition to the will of the invitee is also not worth it.
If the owner suddenly notices that the danger of a dispute is brewing among the guests, you need to tactfully transfer the conversation to another direction. How to do this, prompt intuition. Perhaps a timely joke or a distracting remark will help.
Hosts-spouses at guests should behave with each other exactly, avoiding either disputes or excessive demonstration of love.
It is not recommended to exchange phrases with guests in a foreign language if one of the guests does not know this language - this will put you in an awkward position.
Without an invitation to visit - no, no!
Well-mannered people go by invitation only. You should not literally take the words that you are welcome at any time, and you are always a welcome guest. And even if they are truly sincere, it is impolite to “tumble down” into the house without first coordinating this visit with the owners. And only in relation to the closest friends and relatives can an exception sometimes be made. But even they are better to warn of the impending joy of meeting you in advance.
If you have been invited to visit, you cannot bring friends, acquaintances or children with you without notifying the hosts in advance.
Gathering on a visit, educated people leave their four-legged pets at home. Hosts should also ensure that their pets do not bother guests.
What to bring with you on a visit?
When guests are invited to celebrate a birthday, wedding, housewarming or other significant date, they are sure to buy a gift for the hero of the occasion. And if the meeting is not connected with any date, do not come empty-handed? What is better to bring? You will definitely not be mistaken if you present flowers to the hostess of the house. It is appropriate to bring cake, sweets or other sweets. If the house has small children, you can bring a small toy for them.
And most importantly - take a good mood with you. After all, the most important thing to visit is not a plentiful treat, but an interesting lively conversation, friendship and human warmth.
How to behave at a party? Rules of etiquette
You need to come on time. If you arrive earlier than the stipulated time, the hostess may not be ready yet, or she will not have time to put herself in order to receive guests. You’ll be late - the cooked dishes can cool down, and the hosts and guests arriving on time will become nervous.
Entering the house, first of all, you need to greet the owners and other guests. Demonstratively examine everything around tactlessly. But praise the owners for the comfort created in their home will not hurt - they will be happy.
It is not permissible to express noisy emotions about a meeting with your old acquaintance or friend. It is better to show the joy of the meeting with a smile and a calm polite greeting. Remember the lessons of good manners.
If, on the contrary, something upset you or someone offended you, and this should not be shown to others, so as not to spoil their mood.
Elementary rules on how to behave at a party stipulate that men should look after women. Representatives of the stronger sex help the ladies who came into the room take off their outer clothing, at the table they put food on a plate of a woman sitting next door, pour her drinks. But it’s too open to show sympathy, much less to dissolve one’s hands - it’s extremely uncivilized. If a beautiful stranger is so liked that there was a desire to establish a relationship with her, it is better to take her phone number.
When leaving, you should say goodbye to all those present or at least with the owners. If you need to leave early, you should warn the hosts about this, explaining the reason.
The basic rules of table etiquette
Despite the fact that we do not go to visit in order to eat deliciously, not one such trip is complete without a feast. Therefore, it will not be amiss to recall how to behave at the table.
The first thing to do, sitting down at the table, is to put a napkin on your knees. Remember that it is designed to protect your clothes, and you should not wipe your hands or lips with it. When you need to leave the table, you can leave the napkin on the chair or to the left of your plate.
Before you start your meal, wait for the owner of the house to do this. Before sipping a drink, you must carefully chew and swallow food and wipe your lips with a napkin. A person familiar with the rules of etiquette will never wash down food in his mouth. And one more small nuance - before pouring a drink into your glass, offer it to a table neighbor. After the meal, do not forget to thank the hosts and praise the choice of dishes.
How to use cutlery?
There is a simple rule for using cutlery: first of all, you need to take the one that is located farthest from the plate, and then the one closest to it.
It is supposed to hold the fork in the left hand with the teeth down, and the knife in the right.
The fork handle must be held so that the middle and thumb hold the base, and the index is on top.
Common cutlery is used only with the purpose of putting food from the common into your plate, but sending a common spoon or fork into your mouth is strictly prohibited!
With a short break in food, the cutlery is laid, crossing them perpendicular: knife to the right, fork to the left. To show that you have finished your meal, just put these devices on a plate in parallel.
Ten “NOT” Away
Do not forget about how you can not behave at a party. The rules of good form include the following "NOT":
- Do not enter the bedroom or the kitchen without the permission of the owners;
- Do not put your elbows on the table, do not wave your hands;
- Do not talk at the table on your cell phone;
- do not chew with your mouth open;
- do not champ;
- do not abuse alcohol; do not let yourself get drunk;
- do not force others to drink alcohol;
- do not force guests to make toasts;
- Do not show dissatisfaction with treats or company;
- Do not stay too long, do not beg for the night.
